“Parents grounding you unfairly? Aren’t getting enough allowance? Call 1-800-SUE-DAD.” Could this be in your family’s future?

Photo by Lia Jay Photography

In the recent, and shocking, case of New Jersey teenager Rachel Canning, who sued her parents for child support, no one but the Canning family itself really knows what that family dynamic was, and is. Still, this case of a child who tried to take legal action against her parents strikes at the heart of a value that is critical to good family relationships: gratitude.

Appreciation and gratitude are crucial to any good relationship, so parents who add an “attitude of gratitude” to their parenting personality – and encourage it in their children as well – are sharing a valuable gift. Developing an attitude of gratitude takes a little time but the rewards are priceless. It is literally impossible to share gratitude and appreciation and not feel good, even joyful, in the process.

Here are a few ways to get started creating an attitude of gratitude that resonates in your home:

• Don’t take anything for granted and share that attitude with your child. Let them know how wonderful you think it is to have a roof over your heads and warm beds to sleep in at night. Ask them if they feel fortunate to have their toys, their iPods, or their dog. Express your own feeling of appreciation rather than preaching to your children about “how good they have it”.
• Say “thank you” often, and sincerely. Let your children hear you express your thanks when people do kinds things for you – even simple acts like holding open a door.
• Develop a ritual for appreciation. Before tucking your child in each night, ask them what they most appreciated about their day. And tell them how much YOU appreciate who THEY are.
• Look around for things for you and your children to be grateful for.  Point out the beauty of a rainbow or a great sunset or how a musician’s tremendous talent uplifts your mood.

There is so much to admire and appreciate in our daily lives! Appreciation and gratitude will open your eyes and your children’s to the marvels and opportunities you provide each another, and you can’t put a price on that. My guess is that if more appreciation and gratitude – and less entitlement – had been fostered, a certain New Jersey lawsuit never would have been filed.